9/13
Another weird celebrity dream. I can't tell which part came first, and which came second, so I'll tell it in the order I remembered it when I woke up.
One part was about Lindsay Lohan! Apparently, she had to pay some sort of fine for something, or she was dealing with her legal issues, and was ordered to sell this set of bracelets that she'd been collecting all her life. Tearfully she talked about how her father had been giving her a bracelet every year on her birthday, and they had some sort of "key" that activated speakers inside. She cried that when she turned 18 he was giving her all the keys for them (even though she's been over 18 for some time), and even though a judge ordered her to do so, she didn't want to part with them. Somehow I was given ownership of the bracelets, though an auction or something. She was very upset, and cried, but did give them to me. Then a bunch of rowdy party-girls who looked like they stepped directly out of a Jay Z video came in and when I said I needed help carrying all the purses the bracelets came in (they each came in individual purses, all very elaborate), the ladies snapped into action and we all started piling on these purse straps to our necks, arms, and all around our bodies. There were some pretty purses that I remember... a black one with skulls and fuchsia hearts on it (my favorite, I said) and a yellow and blue leopard one that was pretty and sheer, I told Lindsay she could have it since I didn't feel right about keeping them all.
Then I was at a buffet in a cruise ship or hotel, and a family came to ask if I'd let them sit with me. I said OK, and we sat awhile. The waiters were very attentive but the buffet line was long. I went up to get some seafood lasagna, and remember thinking it looked soooooo good that I took a TON of it and there was a big mound of it on my tray. I confided to the guy next to me that I was in an amorous mood, and he asked if I'd like to have sex with him. Then I was embarrassed, because he was only like 20 and I wasn't really interested. Then I went back to the table and visited with the family. They were all very nice and we had a good time. I don't remember what the lasagna tasted like, though!
Then there was a part where I was in a store kind of like Gabriel's (irregulars) and I was looking at shiny pairs of granny panties. They were pretty and came in all colors - magenta satin, green satin with black lace, silver lame', all kinds of enormous but flashy old-lady underpants. I kept looking and looking, but I couldn't find any in my size. They were all huge-looking, but the size tags indicate that they were too small. I may have bought some anyway just to give it trying them on a whirl.
That's all I remember!
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Emotional Vampires: How to Protect Yourself
We've already discussed how to spot an emotional vampire elsewhere in the blog. This entry will be about ways to protect yourself.
EV's are similar to the vampires of myth in that they feed on people, victimize others, draining them in order to gain strength. And like the glamorous Hollywood and literary vampires that are deeply ingrained in our popular culture, often they seduce with beauty, impress with real or imagined abilities, gain our trust or sympathy before victimizing us. But that's where the similarities end. Unlike the glamorous vampires of legend, these people are really very ordinary. They don't seek our blood, but our lives, our life forces, our happiness. Unfortunately, no amount of happiness will satisfy them --You can render them powerless -- not with garlic or crosses.
First, you need to realize what an emotional vampire is. This is a person who may be intentionally using you, or just "leeching" off of your positivity, or just using you for the benefits of your friendship. Often, they do not care much about you, instead focusing on their own needs and impulses; respect for you comes later (much later!), if at all. But not all EV's realize that they're doing this or that they are acting inappropriately. Some of them are just unstable people who really have no idea how destructive their interactions with people are. You need to realize that much emotional vampirism is done unintentionally. This fact alone will help you protect yourself.
Here are a few other tips...
1. Spot the vampire. The best defense is a good offense. Check my entry for how to determine if someone is an emotional vampire. Knowing the signs will be a huge help to avoiding these sorts of people in the first place!
2. "You're not invited into this house!" Like the vampires of legend, EV's are powerless without an invitation to dine on your good intentions. Don't be afraid to say NO when someone is taking up too much of your time, or asking for favors that make you feel uncomfortable. Most people know when they are asking for too much. An EV does not. Draw your boundaries and stick to your guns. Save your good nature for people who care for you and will have your back when things get problematic for you.
3. Minimize contact, control information. If you must deal with these people, remember that your life is your business. Handle all personal information on a "need to know" basis. You don't need to be paranoid; just choose to share with those you trust. You don't need to behave rudely about it, either, just avoid sharing (or oversharing) any sensitive information. Try to spend as little time and energy on an EV as possible. Save the best parts of yourself for the healthy relationships in your life!
4. The power of positivity. This WILL help you! During times when you must deal with an EV, prepare yourself with a "bubble" of positivity. Meditate and imagine an impenetrable bubble around yourself like an invisible force field. Imagine that the bubble is flexible and moves with you, but is filled up with a "padding" of positive vibrations. Imagine that the EV cannot get through your special bubble. Nothing that he or she does can touch you inside the bubble -- this visualization is a very powerful one, and can work in many situations where you need extra protection!
5. Lastly, realize that an EV is beyond help. You may be made to feel as though you are the only one who can make them "happy," but the truth is that nothing will ever be enough for them. And, long after you are a distant memory left to clean up the destruction they have left in their wake, the EV will have moved onto another victim who then becomes their "perfect" savior. The best you can do is to realize that s/he is someone else's problem now. Don't allow them back into your life!
Photo credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/denise-ann-wells/4056289129/sizes/m/ (Thank you Denise!)
EV's are similar to the vampires of myth in that they feed on people, victimize others, draining them in order to gain strength. And like the glamorous Hollywood and literary vampires that are deeply ingrained in our popular culture, often they seduce with beauty, impress with real or imagined abilities, gain our trust or sympathy before victimizing us. But that's where the similarities end. Unlike the glamorous vampires of legend, these people are really very ordinary. They don't seek our blood, but our lives, our life forces, our happiness. Unfortunately, no amount of happiness will satisfy them --You can render them powerless -- not with garlic or crosses.
Here are a few other tips...
1. Spot the vampire. The best defense is a good offense. Check my entry for how to determine if someone is an emotional vampire. Knowing the signs will be a huge help to avoiding these sorts of people in the first place!
2. "You're not invited into this house!" Like the vampires of legend, EV's are powerless without an invitation to dine on your good intentions. Don't be afraid to say NO when someone is taking up too much of your time, or asking for favors that make you feel uncomfortable. Most people know when they are asking for too much. An EV does not. Draw your boundaries and stick to your guns. Save your good nature for people who care for you and will have your back when things get problematic for you.
3. Minimize contact, control information. If you must deal with these people, remember that your life is your business. Handle all personal information on a "need to know" basis. You don't need to be paranoid; just choose to share with those you trust. You don't need to behave rudely about it, either, just avoid sharing (or oversharing) any sensitive information. Try to spend as little time and energy on an EV as possible. Save the best parts of yourself for the healthy relationships in your life!
4. The power of positivity. This WILL help you! During times when you must deal with an EV, prepare yourself with a "bubble" of positivity. Meditate and imagine an impenetrable bubble around yourself like an invisible force field. Imagine that the bubble is flexible and moves with you, but is filled up with a "padding" of positive vibrations. Imagine that the EV cannot get through your special bubble. Nothing that he or she does can touch you inside the bubble -- this visualization is a very powerful one, and can work in many situations where you need extra protection!
5. Lastly, realize that an EV is beyond help. You may be made to feel as though you are the only one who can make them "happy," but the truth is that nothing will ever be enough for them. And, long after you are a distant memory left to clean up the destruction they have left in their wake, the EV will have moved onto another victim who then becomes their "perfect" savior. The best you can do is to realize that s/he is someone else's problem now. Don't allow them back into your life!
Photo credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/denise-ann-wells/4056289129/sizes/m/ (Thank you Denise!)
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Dream: Taco Boom-Box
8/18
This was another brief, but strange one. I dreamt that I was back in my parents' house, most notably their bathroom (and my mother's husband was still alive). I was waiting for everyone to leave the house so that I could do some things in the bathroom. I fixed my hair and put on some jewelry, then I decided to wank, using my favorite vibrator which was in my repertoire for years & died circa 2006. Unfortunately, I kept getting distracted by people coming home and bothering me (asking me questions and trying to make small talk) so I never really got to finish. At one point, I even got distracted by someone outside walking around with a boom-box which was blaring an advertisement/warning for everyone within earshot to "AVOID TACOS! DON'T EAT THE TACOS! TACOS ARE DANGEROUS, SO DON'T EAT THEM!" and another person who was competing with the boom-box lady, yelling "YES! Everyone SHOULD eat tacos! Tacos are completely safe and people should eat them!" Apparently boom-box street advertising had become a cool new way to advertise. (Actually that sounds like an interesting idea.)
This was another brief, but strange one. I dreamt that I was back in my parents' house, most notably their bathroom (and my mother's husband was still alive). I was waiting for everyone to leave the house so that I could do some things in the bathroom. I fixed my hair and put on some jewelry, then I decided to wank, using my favorite vibrator which was in my repertoire for years & died circa 2006. Unfortunately, I kept getting distracted by people coming home and bothering me (asking me questions and trying to make small talk) so I never really got to finish. At one point, I even got distracted by someone outside walking around with a boom-box which was blaring an advertisement/warning for everyone within earshot to "AVOID TACOS! DON'T EAT THE TACOS! TACOS ARE DANGEROUS, SO DON'T EAT THEM!" and another person who was competing with the boom-box lady, yelling "YES! Everyone SHOULD eat tacos! Tacos are completely safe and people should eat them!" Apparently boom-box street advertising had become a cool new way to advertise. (Actually that sounds like an interesting idea.)
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Dream: Another School Bus Dream
8/17
I don't remember much about this dream except that I was in school (high school) and I had to take the school bus home. Something had happened, though, and I'd either gotten on the wrong bus, or the bus somehow got lost. That's all that comes to mind, but I do remember an element of danger riding on a lost/strange bus.
I don't remember much about this dream except that I was in school (high school) and I had to take the school bus home. Something had happened, though, and I'd either gotten on the wrong bus, or the bus somehow got lost. That's all that comes to mind, but I do remember an element of danger riding on a lost/strange bus.
Monday, August 9, 2010
Dream: Burglar
8/8
Not much about this dream in my memory, except that it was scary. My husband was out of town (San Francisco?) and I was in the house alone. For some reason I was scared shitless, there might have been someone trying to break in and/or I was just afraid there might have been. In the dream, I either called, emailed, or IMed with my friend Chris and begged him to come over after work and stay in the guest room until Fuzz came back from his trip. He agreed, but then a bunch of things kept happening and for some reason his arrival was delayed. I saw an "outside shot" of our house from outside, the lights in front of the windows flashing on and off on timers or something. (I remember thinking they looked pretty convincingly like several people were inside.) I think Chris did eventually arrive, I remember feeling relieved. At one point I may have regressed to my teenage self living at my parents' house. My bed turned from my current king-size bed to a twin, and the bedframe broke under my weight when I tried to lay on it. The mattress had no sheet, and it was all ripped up and nasty looking. I remember feeling bad and wishing Fuzz would come take me "home" away from my parents' house so I could sleep in our bed together again. I think he might have come back, but can't remember if we went home or just squished together in the broken-down twin bed.
Not much about this dream in my memory, except that it was scary. My husband was out of town (San Francisco?) and I was in the house alone. For some reason I was scared shitless, there might have been someone trying to break in and/or I was just afraid there might have been. In the dream, I either called, emailed, or IMed with my friend Chris and begged him to come over after work and stay in the guest room until Fuzz came back from his trip. He agreed, but then a bunch of things kept happening and for some reason his arrival was delayed. I saw an "outside shot" of our house from outside, the lights in front of the windows flashing on and off on timers or something. (I remember thinking they looked pretty convincingly like several people were inside.) I think Chris did eventually arrive, I remember feeling relieved. At one point I may have regressed to my teenage self living at my parents' house. My bed turned from my current king-size bed to a twin, and the bedframe broke under my weight when I tried to lay on it. The mattress had no sheet, and it was all ripped up and nasty looking. I remember feeling bad and wishing Fuzz would come take me "home" away from my parents' house so I could sleep in our bed together again. I think he might have come back, but can't remember if we went home or just squished together in the broken-down twin bed.
Saturday, August 7, 2010
Dream: Pissed-Off Aunt
8/6
I don't remember a lot about this dream, except that I was staying in New Jersey with my aunt & uncle & cousins. (I don't know if I was younger in the dream, or the age that I am now.) Apparently, my cousins and I had a curfew of 11:15, at which time we had to go in the house. We were swimming, and it was way before curfew but I wanted to re-negotiate with my aunt for a curfew of midnight. She said no, and I got really pissed off -- like extremely pissed -- and so I ran around the yard, punching at the air. At one point I punched the air near an archway made of tree branches. She got super upset and started screaming that I punched at the archway and broke it on purpose. (I did swing my arms and punch around them, but did not make contact.) The tree archway was unharmed, but she kept insisting that I ruined it and demolished the trees. She screamed for her husband, yelling that I ruined their archway even though I didn't. I woke up around that point.
I don't remember a lot about this dream, except that I was staying in New Jersey with my aunt & uncle & cousins. (I don't know if I was younger in the dream, or the age that I am now.) Apparently, my cousins and I had a curfew of 11:15, at which time we had to go in the house. We were swimming, and it was way before curfew but I wanted to re-negotiate with my aunt for a curfew of midnight. She said no, and I got really pissed off -- like extremely pissed -- and so I ran around the yard, punching at the air. At one point I punched the air near an archway made of tree branches. She got super upset and started screaming that I punched at the archway and broke it on purpose. (I did swing my arms and punch around them, but did not make contact.) The tree archway was unharmed, but she kept insisting that I ruined it and demolished the trees. She screamed for her husband, yelling that I ruined their archway even though I didn't. I woke up around that point.
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Dream: Black Angel Rabbit
8/4Dreamt of a "black angel rabbit" -- somehow, we were visiting Italy & the home we stayed at had facilities for bunnies. I went for a walk (looked a lot like home) and I saw him. He was a beautiful baby bunny with a broken leg, and he sort of dragged it behind him. It looked like there was green planty things (burrs or edamame?) stuck on his foot. I picked him up to carry him home, worried about predators and cars. He struggled to get away. He opened his mouth and screamed at me, seemingly terrified for his life. I petted him and tried to be reassuring. The bunny was mostly black, with a tiny bit of brown mostly on his head and face. His ears were long and kinda skinnyish, up-ears but a bit on the floppy side like Seamus. He reminded me a lot of Seamus, but looked "wilder" somehow. When we got back to the house, I put him in a bunny "cage" area without bars. (Phineas and Jarvis were possibly there.) There were lamps and a fake log, as if for turtles in an aquarium, but way bigger for bunnies. They knew they weren't supposed to leave the area despite lack of enclosure, but I worried that they wouldn't take kindly to baby bun, or that baby bun wouldn't know that he needed to stay put. I think we called a vet to look at his leg. Strangers lived in the house, and they spoke Italian. We were definitely just visiting, didn't live there. I also looked something up about "black angel rabbit" or "black rabbit angel" on the internet; apparently (in the dream) there was an anime character by that name. I wanted to name the bunny Angelus.
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